Ouija [Bored] (2014) Review

In the aftermath of the unexpected death of her best friend, a high school senior named Laine tries to say her goodbyes with the help of her friends, and an antique Ouija board. In attempting to contact the friend, Debbie, they happen upon another spirit that resides within the home, who calls itself DZ. After contacting this angry spirit and one other, the friends realize that not only was Debbie murdered, but also they will face the same fate if they fail to understand the history they have uncovered, and successfully close the doorway to the other side.

For its time, this movie was interesting. I wasn’t excited, but I was intrigued. Being superstitious, the prospect of watching a film centered around something I had been constantly warned not to use and in turned warned others of was nifty. It seemed like a promising concept that would at least offer around two hours of entertainment and a jump-scare here and there. Unfortunately, I was to be greatly disappointed.

Ouija, is the most boring, hackneyed, and mundane film I had seen in a very long time. I even re-watched it this past night to make sure that it wasn’t my teenage cynicism clouding my judgment. Yet lo and behold, it was just as poorly made as I remembered it if not worse. It follows the same exact track that countless movies have before it, and what could have been an interesting story surrounding the ghosts ended up being brushed under the rug for the sake of some scares.

You may think, “Hey, it had to have had some interesting points! What about that plot twist?”

Oh I’ll tell you about that plot twist. It was the same thing I’d seen in the American version of One Missed Call. The film itself followed such a similar equation/routine (like in Unborn, Sorority Row, My Soul to Take, Legion, Grave Encounters, etc.) as movies before it had that it’s obvious it was a poor attempt at a money grab along with allowing some D list actors’ their 15 minutes of fame.

The film was so predictable that the jump-scares felt like lullabies; the acting reminded me of fifth grade; and the ending was reminiscent of a simple mans’ attempt to be witty. The whole thing fell flat on its rear end while trying to be cool and instead of getting back up and walking it off, cried and pulled grass out of the ground to try to distract from the embarrassment that was Ouija.

The scariest part of this film was that I thought there might be a sequel.

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